Five things I am grateful for today

1. Last night after E got home from work he, RR and I went for a drive up to the Foothills to go look at the city lights.

2. RR is sitting next to me with his head resting on a pillow, his eyes half closed and one of his ears sticking up.

3. About to draw a carrot and a bracelet.

4. Compassionate communication class tonight.

5. Date with Mead to eat snacks, see some art, chat and listen to a great band.

Five things I am grateful for today

1. Closeness with my mom.

2. Feeling relaxed in yoga class.

3. Sunset walk with Roofrauff, not too hot.

4. About to practice drawing, tonight's subject: a couple of shells.

5. Tonight I am also working on some framed collages and maybe reading my book.

Five things I am grateful for today

1. Drawing class #1. I like the way the teacher communicates--I like the way she encourages the students yet speaks with honesty about what she is seeing. I like how she is flexible while still laying down the law on how she wants us to do things. I like the size of the class, around 15 people. I like that it is downtown--outside of my usual flight pattern, it feels like an adventure. I liked the people sitting near me, from the little bit that I spoke to them. I like that we don't have to share our work. I liked the exercises. I liked that she said that it isn't so much a class where we make art as a nuts and bolts class for the skills of how to draw. If I am not expecting to make art it takes a lot of pressure off.

2. Last night E and I stayed up watching The Outlaw Josie Wales. And we ate snacks (carrots and parmesan pita chips with a dip that I made, and cookies) while watching the movie.

3. Mead and I met up at a coffee shop around the corner from my art class after she got off of work. We had fun sharing some ideas. It feels good to have friends who inspire me to think hard and to grow.

4. I had a good phone chat with my mom today. Short but full of love. Three weeks from tomorrow we meet up in San Francisco for five days for her birthday and the wedding of a family friend. Yippee!

5. I am going to go do some drawing and writing and then maybe make a few cards.

Recipe for the very best dip I have ever made:

1 cup cashews

3/4 cup water

3 Tbs almond butter

1/4 cup sesame seeds

1/4 cup nutritional yeast

2 Tbs Braggs liquid aminos

a good squeeze of lemon juice

some roasted red peppers

1 garlic clove

Put it all in the food processor until it is really well mixed and the sesame seeds aren't all whole anymore. Try not to eat it all at once. Eric loves this too, it's not just me...

Five things I am grateful for today

1. My weekend has begun! And not a minute too soon, by the time the end of my second shift rolls around I couldn't be more ready to head on home and stay there all week.

2. E and I lurked around and had a good day. He had marinated chicken in a carne asada kinda marinade, yum! So he decided we should go to the tortilla factory in South Tucson and buy some tortillas and make burritos. Dinner was delicious, needless to say!

3. I'm about to get my craft on.

4. 21 hours til my drawing class. Not that I am excited... because you know, I'm chill. All items from the supplies list purchased and in my favorite bag by the front door: check. Acknowledging my excited nerdiness: checkety check.

5. It was sunny and warm today, but not too hot.

5.5 And now it's getting to be a full moon, E and I might ride bikes once he gets home from band practice. I hope so!

Five things I am grateful for today

1. Good sleep. 8 hours.

2. The sound of the blinds gently hitting the open window waking me up to a warm and beautiful day.

3. Dinner with Prince Charming--we made it together which always makes me happy. Basmati rice, sauteed chard with a cashew-almond butter red pepper sauce, and mango chicken sausages. Heavenly, if I do say so myself.

4. My shift started out looking like it would be a disaster but the charge nurse came to the rescue, fixed my assignment and everything has been good. I have a great tech, nice patients, a good lunch (well, three good lunches, mwahaha! I get hungry every four hours, even if it is the middle of the night!)

5. Seven hours until my weekend! I hope I have the energy for creative things, all weekend (work week) I have been pining away to play in my studio.

Five things I am grateful for today

1. Morning lurking with my love.

2. Off to Trader Joe's to find some relatively healthy pre-made goodness to eat at work this weekend.

3. A good job that lets me relax five days a week. During this time of healing a lot of time alone/down time makes a really big difference.

4. My impending drawing class has me feeling really positive about my creative future. I have posted before about wanting to focus more on art than crafting, paint more and produce less. I am happy to be taking a step in that direction.

5. Meanwhile I got a couple of checks from the shops in town selling my crafts, a whole bunch sold last month. It always feels good to know that people are enjoying my work. I hope they write letters full of love on the cards that they buy. I love the idea of the cards I made going out into the world and being used to express love, gratitude, care, and other good feelings.

Just thinking about all this makes me wish that my work would call me off so I could make cards all night and maybe paint a small painting! Better that I should work to pay for the drawing class though...

Grateful and some schemes and things

No posts since Sunday, and today is Friday! Sheesh! My friend Wendy has been in town and we have been living it up. She left today so I am back.

Today I am particularly grateful for my friends, how much they care, and how they show it. This really is a rough patch and I am so appreciative that they bother to show up even though there is so little that can be said or done. Thank you, thank you, thank you for showing up. Thank you for cooking me dinner and petting me and saying "there there" and listening and letting me cry.

Roofrauff and I went for a nice walk at sunset. I saw some flowers that I had never seen before. They were dark red with some yellow and black. It was neat to see flowers that were new to me.

Tonight I signed up for a drawing course. It starts on Tuesday and lasts for eight weeks--three hours every Tuesday night. For years I have felt like I am not a "real" artist because I can't draw well. Last week my artist-neighbor told me during my first drawing lesson ever on her front porch, that drawing is a skill that can be learned. I believe her, or at least I want to believe her. I thought about it and almost every artist who I really respect and love has had some formal art training, which probably included some drawing lessons. I have avoided this because of a couple of things: 1. fear of failure, and 2. that it would be boring because so far in this life I haven't liked drawing. But if I can learn to draw so many doors will open--I have had so many ideas that I couldn't communicate to the world because I don't speak the drawn language. I want that to change--I want to draw anatomical hearts with wings that look much better. I want to draw better trees. I want to draw nasturiums and people holding hands inside of flowers and having picnics in silly places. (I love picnics. and love. and columbine flowers. and poppies.) And I want to paint better and everybody says that you have to be able to draw to paint. So here goes--scared as heck, which is usually a good sign.

I just ate leftover Chinese food and fuji apples with nutella. YUM! Oh and carrots, of course.

It was great having Wendy in town--we both found some awesome new shoes, went for a couple of walks, ate good food, and pretty much caught up for three days straight. Also we went over to Regina's to craft--that was fun because before this they were just friends through their respective blogs.

Oh yeah, and today we (Wendy, Eric and I) ate at Poco and Mom's--I swear they are in my top three for Tucson breakfasts. (along with The Cup, and the third space remains open for a restaurant not yet found.) Wendy and I split the Silver City--hashbrowns, green chiles, onions, cheese, and two eggs on top. It's the perfect amount of spicy and totally delicious.

Well, that about catches me up, apart from the zillion little things each day that I am grateful for and forget to write down: Roofrauff's waggley tail, limeade, sunshine, being heart-close to my mom, the bright yellow blossoms on the Palo Verde trees, my safety, free time, Eric's understanding and wonderful personality and cuteness, that peaches are coming into season, and the salty crunch of potato chips, and, and, and...

Five things I am grateful for today

1. A good shift last night. It was very busy but rewarding and had a good flow.

2. I slept well all day today.

3. Yummy leftovers.

4. Sunshine.

5. Wendy will be here in 48 hours!

Five things I am grateful for today

1. Our house is gloriously clean. It feels heavenly!

2. Date with my lovebeast for lunch, sitting outside, smoochin', drinking limeade, (he had iced tea) and eating yummy things.

3. Bought good healthy groceries.

4. Early evening walk with my Pickley dog.

5. Cooked a big ol' dinner for me and Eric along with a vegan lasagna for work this weekend. I made the vegan lasagna with macadamia nuts instead of cashews...not quite sure how it's turning out...so probably use cashews would be my advice!

Update on The Plan: this week I have written almost every day, drank a whole lot more water, walked most days, and eaten breakfast within a little while of waking most days. This coming week I am going to walk more and keep up the good work. I really do seem to be feeling better.

Five things I am grateful for today

1. I slept pretty well and feel well rested today.

2. I felt creative but sort of overwhelmed by all of my glorious art supplies and good ideas. So I just made some stationery and wrote my friend Abby a letter.

3. This led me to a new good idea that I will post later on--it's a gift so I have to give it before I post it.

4. My compassionate communication class was very useful. I swear it feels remarkably similar to learning Spanish. When I was in the Dominican Republic and would try to have conversations sometimes I was so caught up in conjugating verbs that I wasn't able to really connect with people. Sometimes I feel like that now with NVC--I am so busy trying to get my words right that I sort of lose track of the whole point, connecting. It feels good to be learning. In life doesn't it seem like when you really focus your attention in one area for awhile you get to a point and the growth comes much more quickly? I love that feeling.

5. I dressed very cute today. A short, funky dress thingy over jeans that Mead gave me with a handmade flower pin from Wendy. Dressing cute and staying home is not a waste of time it turns out.

Off to work on secret projects!

Five things I am grateful for today

1. A good healthcare provider CPR class that was interesting and fast paced.

2. Not to be rude to this day, but I am so glad it's over. It was challenging with a few too many things to do and by challenging I mean difficult and uncomfortable. And it's over! Nothing left to do but hang around.

3. Tomorrow involves nothing that I don't want to do. (I am going to sleep in, relax, play with Regina, and go to my compassionate communication class.)

4. Roofrauff was VERY happy and squiggley when I came home.

5. I had three good home visits today.

Sayonara things to do. Time for a cup of tea and a good snuggle with Roofrauff.

Five things I am grateful for today

1. Eric and I woke up at a reasonable hour for once and spent the whole morning lurking around together. It was wonderful!

2. One week til Wendy visits.

3. At sunset I stopped by my next door neighbors' house to see if they wanted to walk dogs with me and Roo. (I think I mentioned this before but they are friends of a friend, both artists and she is an acupuncturist.) So Gabrielle and I went for a walk with their dog Rico (who Roofrauff thinks is VERY cool) around our neighborhood. When we got back Andy, her husband, had made dinner and invited me to stay. It was DELICOUS! Free range chicken, amazing rice goodness, spinach and yams. I felt like a kid because Gabrielle came over to see my studio and wanted to see all of my art, "show me more!" and then we went to her house and looked at her studio and her art. It was beautiful and painfully inspiring. Andy is also really into paper and has some neat stamps, I hear. And Gabrielle offered to teach me to draw--she went to art school before acupuncture. It felt so good to hang around with other people who make art.

3.5 Speaking of which, Thursday Regina is coming over!

4. Tomorrow our friend Barb is cutting my hair at this neat shop downtown. A new haircut, what could be better? It will be pokey and kinda short and cute. Very cute. Snort, snort, snort, I can't wait!

5. I am off to play in my studio! What shall I work on?!! Yippee! I am so excited.

Good night! Wishing inspiration and joy in your direction.

Five things I am grateful for today

1. A great date with Eric. We went up to Reddington Pass again and hiked down to a stream. It was so peaceful. Then we shot his 22's at his metal turkey target which was also fun.

2. I taught an informal inservice on tracheostomy care today. Luckily I had a trached patient this weekend in the hospital because it had been a couple of years since I last did trach care! In my hospital we rely on respiratory therapists to do it for us. And how was I going to teach something I hadn't done in at least two years?! The respiratory therapist re-taught me how to do it, and then I passed on her expertise to the adult care home where one of my home health patients is living. Also my clinical supervisor agreed to come along to fill in anything that I left out. It went really well.

3. Tortilla soup for dinner.

4. My friend Sande is leaving for a long while and I had a chance to say goodbye to her tonight. I am sad she is leaving but excited for her--she is all set for great adventures! I wish her well.

5. I had two really good shifts this weekend. I had one patient in particular who I really connected with. She had a hard time sleeping on Saturday night so we sat and chatted for hours--about crafts, love, family, and on and on. She asked her husband to bring in one of her crafts for me as a gift and she gave it to me last night. I will try to post a picture of it as it's beautiful!

And now MY weekend begins!

Five things I am grateful for today

1. My lunch for work is already made. The best part of it is a fruit salad I made to take to Regina's last night. It has blackberries, strawberries, watermelon and apples.

2. For breakfast I made us a scramble with fresh basil, tiny tomatoes, mushrooms, onions and pepper jack cheese. We ate it with bacon, crumpets, fruit salad and yummy Odwalla orange juice.

3. I work tonight and have no sense of dread. This is new for me--since I became a nurse I have always dreaded coming back after a weekend. There was always a sense of "something horrible will happen and I won't be able to handle it." And I can't even count how many times that was true--not in the sense that my patients were crashing, it just felt really out of control most of the time. And now it doesn't. Now I think to myself, "well I will probably work hard, but I can handle it--it most likely won't get too out of hand. " And I don't feel anxious. When I was in nursing school I asked a lot of nurses how long it takes to get comfortable as a nurse. Without fail they always said about three years. I kept asking because I didn't like the answer. And here I am three years in, and maybe what this is, is that I am starting to get comfortable.

4. I am working on a secret craft. Two Spellmonster Creations readers have birthdays in June--so I can't go into detail. But I am having fun with it.

5. Eric always does the laundry. He washes it, folds it, and usually even puts it away. I am very grateful for that.

The Plan

I have been tired for a few weeks now and I have a theory about what might help me to feel better. There is something about posting it here that makes it official. Thank you for listening!

To be done each day:

1. Drink more water.

2. Eat breakfast within an hour and a half of waking.

3. Write three pages or more.

4. Walk or ride my bike.

There it is, my plan, I am starting today. Breakfast, check. Off to go get a glass of water and my journal. Roofrauff, we have a date at 5:30--clear your schedule and put on your sneakers.

If you have anything to say about what grounds you and/or gives you energy, I would love to hear about it. Feel free to post your ideas in the comments section!

Five things I am grateful for today

1. Closeness with my mom.

2. Our refrigerator is full of good food. I am so grateful that we have enough to eat and never have to make the decision between buying food and paying rent or for utilities or prescriptions.

3. Regina made a wonderful dinner tonight. It was great to catch up with her and her sweet boys.

4. I stopped by my home health agency today, my boss hugged me, gave me a plant and some other little gifts and said, "Happy Nurses' Week! I really appreciate your hard work." That was really nice to hear.

5. Eric's friend Michelle had a surprise birthday party tonight. It's really nice how she and her sister, Shannon include me in things so often.

Five things I am grateful for today

I really like today, just for the record.

1. Eric made lunch for us while I charted.

2. I had a really good home health visit with a patient--I scheduled it to coordinate with her nurse practitioner's visit (the patient is too sick and medically unstable to attend appointments). The patient's NP, the adult care home owner and I all sat at the dining room table and coordinated her care. Now we are all on the same page about what the plan is, and how we can help her to get better. This is what healthcare looks like when it works.

3. I only slept 8.5 hours last night! That is the least amount of sleep I have had since that creepy virus I had a couple of weeks back. I feel more energetic today and am actually capable of getting a few things done!

4. I went to Trader Joe's for some happy grocery shopping. Crumpets, cheddar from grass fed cows, cookies, all sorts of fruits and veggies, and some varied protein sources too.

5. Mead is coming over tonight. We are exchanging a haircut for a back rub. I am getting the haircut and giving the back rub. Also we are eating bean tacos. There might even be time for crafts?

Recent Crafts: second post

This frame is for our friend Shannon's birthday. She just got a tattoo of a Dia de los Muertos skeleton lady with flowers and butterflies.

The frame below is for Abby for entering the Wanna Play? challenge. It still needs to be mailed... I guess this sort of ruins the surprise. Hey Habichuelas: surprise!

Recent Crafts

Two weeks ago I wrote that I was working on some frames. I am finally getting around to posting the pictures now. As I can only include five pictures per post there will be two posts.

This first one was a present to me from me to celebrate getting my bike tuned up.

This second frame was Mead's prize for entering the challenge.

The third project was Wendy's gift for entering the challenge. We were only 18 or 19 years , aren't we cute?

Ten things I am grateful for today

1. Great chat with my mama tonight.

2. Walk with Eric and RR under the stars. And now lurking around on the couch eating frozen pizza and talking.

3. Loved my compassionate communication class tonight.

4. My big ol' shipment of compassionate communication books came today. I can't open it for complicated reasons, but hopefully will be able to tomorrow.

5. Picked up a third home health patient today.

6. Slept well til around 2pm.

7. For dinner (1st dinner) E and I ate yummy salads and cambazola cheese and crackers. YUM! Cambazola is my favorite cheese right now.

8. 5 days off besides home health!

9. I finished my book: Humanizing Healthcare and am excited to start another!

10. Warm sunshine.

Five things I am grateful for today

1. Tonight my work has been immensely rewarding. I thought I wanted to write about it in depth, but right now, at 5:03am I am feeling kind of tired. Suffice to say that today I am glad to be a nurse. Today I think that I would rather do this than anything else.

2. I wanted to share this quote: "Anyone can slay a dragon, he told me, but try waking up every morning & loving the world all over again. That's what takes a real hero." Brian Andreas I saw this hanging up in a picture frame in our family's cancer counselor's office in Portland. I wrote it down and meant to post it then because I love it and believe it with my whole heart, broken and scraw as it is these days. One reason I love it is because it reminds me of Eric--even with his overwhelming responsibilities he wakes up everyday and is so gentle and nurturing. And despite his ass-kicking attitude (or maybe because of it) on the inside he never loses hope or hardens himself to the world. I am grateful to have him close to inspire me.

3. I slept pretty well today.

4. My weekend might start in two hours and fifteen minutes. Unless I come back tonight for an extra shift. Either way, I am grateful.

5. I am feeling crafty-inspired and am looking forward to playing in my studio. I took last week off as I am still recovering from that virus that I had. But I am hoping to sleep well at night this week, wake up rested and craft like a fiend. I also want to read my new compassionate communication books, cook some healthy creations, walk Roofrauff, do yoga, and peace out. Heard all that before? Yeah, I think I probably say it every week.

p.s. I am so grateful to have had such a wonderful father. The more I think about him the and miss him the more grateful I feel. And one other thing that I am so glad for: I am so very glad that I took every opportunity to thank him for everything along the way. I am so glad that no love or gratitude was left unexpressed. Sometimes I think that I am overly expressive, but I guess that turns out okay in the end. Snarf, I miss him more all the time though. So don't forget to tell the ones you love why you love them!

Lots of things I have been grateful for over the past few days

I can't believe I haven't posted since Wednesday, so many neat things have happened!

Thursday I was given a new home health patient. I will only have her for a few weeks, but I really enjoyed the visit because it was just for med management and she really needed the help. Not only did she need it, but she appreciated it. That's always nice.

After that I came home to Eric making us tacos out of leftovers in the fridge. Why does food taste better when he prepares it?

Thursday evening I went for my Compassionate Communication class and only one other person was there! It is such a treat every once in a while when there are only a couple of people who show up!

Thursday night E and I went to Epic Cafe for a late night date. There was live music that was pretty good, yummy snacks, and we had a great time.

Friday was our official date day. We went up to Reddington Pass to hike around with Roofrauff, eat cheddar cheese straws and fuji apples, and shoot Eric's 22. There were lots of wildflowers and cacti blooming which made it extra beautiful. And there is just something about driving fast on dirt roads with the dog chasing the car that brings out my inner hick, and darn that makes me happy! We got home after dark and went to Korea House for dinner where we feasted. It was scrumptious.

Friday night when we got home there was a package from my aunt and uncle with a framed picture of me and my cousin when we were 4 and 6 (she is two years older). It is super cute--me with my lil mullet, her looking like the big sister that we liked to pretend that she was, both of us with our big old smiles because hanging out together is the best thing ever.

I can't remember if I mentioned that I bought myself a bunch of books about Compassionate Communication. There is a great deal through Puddledancer Press that I just couldn't pass up. I am so excited to get my books!

Today Eric cleared all of the weeds in our backyard.

I made homemade croutons to go on our caesar salad with dinner. We had some leftover rosemary olive oil bread which was perfect for croutons! Yum!

I am still getting over my virus and have been really tired all week. No crafties to report! Though I still need to take pictures of those frames...